Preface: This post a real-time recount of what happened on my Megabus trip to Philadelphia. I paid $6 to get from Charlotte to Philly. I think this was an excellent price for such a long journey. So, here’s what happened…

12pm – Noon: Charlotte – I already question the decision I made to take the Megabus. There is someone who is singing Dora the Explorer songs to her kid…and the bus is still loading, and there is someone sitting across from me who is working to outfit her salon with just the right type of flatiron holder.

2:58pm: Durham stop – I had to witness a rendition of The Color Purple as this one girl was separated from her loved ones. “Nothing but death can keep me from it” would have been the correct quote, but the girl on the bus garbled it up and said something entirely different. I swear these young kids nowadays. If you’re not up on your Color Purple recitation skills…well, just be quiet. Anyway, they then continued to do the air patty cake, and this went on until the driver closed the door in her face. Like, he literally closed it an inch from her face. Three late arrivals made us leave 3 minutes late. The driver was not amused by their tardiness and was quick to tell them so.

5:03pm: Backwoods Virginia -The bus driver stopped for a break at some travel stop on some back road, somewhere in VA. His explicit decree: the bus will depart at 5pm. With that decree made, he allow us to roam free until the appointed time. I frolicked, roamed, and finally got more food. Ok, so this travel center had a Subway restaurant, and working in this restaurant were theee slowest workers ever. So let’s just say that I reached the bus at 5:00:30 and found myself standing on the outside of the bus with puppy dog eyes, hoping the driver would take pity and let me on the bus. He let me in and lucky for me, I don’t have the distinction of being the last person on the bus. That honor goes to the dude who was in front of me at Subway.

THE BUS DRIVER ALMOST LEFT ME IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!

— DanielleJ.Me (@DanielleJMe) May 30, 2012

8:05pm(approx): Union Station, Washington, DC – The bus arrived safely and I am sitting here wondering where the restaurants are. I’m not hungry, but sitting in the bus depot is not fun. At this point my only entertainment is this lady talking about some dude who has been married 3 times and he has cheated on all of his wives. I agree “girl, you don’t want to be involved with him”.

Remember the flatiron searcher from noon? Well, we talked and she sells Indian hair and is a hair stylist. I am proud to say that I interacted with a stranger. Yay me.

9:55pm: Union Station, Washington, DC – it appears that my new bus driver fashions himself to be some sort of bus driving radio talent. He talked on and on (most likely because he loves the sound of his own voice) about how clean the bus is. It appears, too, that we must be subjected to his favorite urban radio station. This means that I must endure Mary J Blige’s crooning about how she’s not gon’ cry. I guess the best part of this trip is that it is the last leg of a long, long journey from Atlanta to Philadelphia.